Rekindling Connections in a Modern Marriage

Being married is a lot more complicated than I could have ever imagined. Especially with little kids to care for! Things have certainly changed from the 1980's when I was a kid. My parents kissed all the time, they were firm in sending the kids to bed by 9, and they were happy. It all seems so simple.

Fast forward to today. Finding a moment to even say hi to my husband is a challenge. I have to plan in advance for kissing, and that firm bedtime... HAHAHA. I spend my 2 hours a night after tucking the kids in, running back and forth to the kids who I swear never sleep more than 3 minutes at a time.

Do you know what that kind of lifestyle does to a marriage?

I do. It makes it harder than ever to celebrate the little things. It makes it difficult to stay connected. It makes things stressful.

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There are so many outside factors working against our marriages in modern times. From apps that want to connect you to others, to the influences on TV, to the mentality of only making time for romance on holidays like Valentine's Day and wedding anniversaries. If you aren't planning ahead to make an effort, the modern mariage can get stale in record time.

My own marriage is not immune to this. In under a decade, things have been staler than a loaf of bread left out for a decade! That is why I plan ahead to make time to savor my partner, to show him that this crazy adventure of raising a family together, and the fact that we are both STILL HERE is something to celebrate.

How do you celebrate the everyday moments in your marriage?

If it were up to my husband it would be a netflix and chill kind of night every night. He isn't the most romantic guy, and he also lacks motivation. So, I take it upon myself to make an effort and knock his socks off.

First, I start wearing the kids out early in the day. I encourage them to jump on the trampoline, I take them for a long walk and we always make a play date with a friend. The phrase a day well spent brings happy sleep becomes my mantra of the day.

I plan a late dinner for two that has something on the menu that is not your average dinner at home. Handmade crab cakes, filet mignon, or even double crust quiche are the kind of meals that set the scene. As a girl, I grew hearing the way to a man's heart is thru his stomach, and it is true with my husband today.

The way to my heart happens to be paved with corks and bubbles, so a chilled bottle of Champagne is a must have for me. I love that champagne lifts my spirits with each bubbly sip. Oddbins range of champagne is perfect for celebrating life's moments.

After the drinks have been poured and the food consumed, it is time to get to the serious business of rekindling connections. We have been known to play a board game, lay on the kids trampoline and look at the stars or even create fun things with 3D pens together.

When we are having fun together and avoiding the outside influences that can be so draining on a marriage, the romance has a way of coming around naturally.

Modern marriage may be harder to maintain than it was in previous generations, but there are ways to make it work. With planning, attention to detail and a willingness to devote time to each other, and a great bottle of champagne every now and then, our connections get stronger as does a commitment to
staying together through out the temptations, stresses and challenges.

If you have a tip for making a marriage flourish, I hope you will leave me a comment to inspire others in their efforts of making modern marriage work.


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